Moving On from Memories

Hey, you. Yesterday was all about memories and fears and drinking up my tears. I was really happy, for a time, and now it's gone, and it's fine. It's just that our brains have a really interesting way to store memories.

I see these faces, friendly faces. They're your friends' faces. You're not there. But they're you. They're yours.
I see the night sky, and remember how I said to you that it's cloudy because there's not a star in sight. The thought is mine, and the words are mine. But that cloudy sky is yours, somehow.
As I sighed I look at my wrist, there lay a purple hair band. And I remember how I twisted and turned it inside out, as I sat there on the porch talking with you about why Koalas are yellow. You called me smart. You drank out of my last bottle of water, and told me I can take yours instead. You took the purple hair band off the cap where I put it. This purple hair band was mine. Now it's forever froze in time with that girl wearing a blue shirt and knitted woollen cardigan, sitting on the porch smiling. Throwing it to your chest and picking it back up again. And again. And again.

I wore pink the day I decided to break my own heart. I brought my black jacket that you were never supposed to see. Going with you was a girl dressed in pink. Saying goodbye to you was a girl draped in black.
But she's still pink inside. That walk of shame, that internal scream. What strong determination, the tears never left her eyes the whole time.
I'm okay, she said to herself.
You're not. That's what someone else said.

I cried in my friend's arm, trying to ease the pain in my chest. It feels so much like a whip to the heart. It's not bleeding. It's just red. And the pain is just there.
It hurts. It really hurt.
I remembered the time.
Eleven PM will always be yours.

I snapped back to reality. It was a thousand years ago. It's getting late, I should get home.
"Will you be okay?"
"I'll be fine."
I took a sip of my coffee, bid my goodbyes, and went on my own.

As I drove, colors flashed in my peripherals, cheerfully rotating on the fringes of A Mild billboards.
I drove past an intersection. Then I remembered the blue car.
The one I saw with you. That perfect shade of blue.
Blue cars were mine... Blue cars were my thing. And now I shared the memory with you. I wish I hadn't. Oh, how I wish I hadn't.
That hue was damn fine, I thought. Like the blue sweater you wore.
Warm, and cold, and fine.

Will I ever get past this?
Will the memories ever cease to find me everywhere?
Like everything else, this too will come and go.
And I'll be alright.
Everything will be alright.

Someday I'll wish upon a star 

And wake up where the clouds are far behind me 

Where troubles melt like lemon drops, away above the chimney tops 

That's where you'll find me